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So here I am, on a Tuesday morning just waiting to leave to collect my jet setting daughter from Heathrow.  I learnt over night via Twitter that she was delivered to JFK in a stretch limo, as you do, and from Facebook that she has added some more electric ink to her small but perfectly formed body.  And what have I been doing?? Oh yes … I have just walked back in the house from my latest mission of trying to catch my chicken, Mrs Hen, who is showing signs of being poorly.  I don’t think it has anything to do with the baked beans she ate on Sunday, so I referred to my daily life curing manual and ultimate encyclopedia of life.. GOOGLE!  Loads of other chicken owners, many of them possibly fanatics/nutters from America, post on a chat allotment website and a smallholdings site “the essential tool for Smallholders“, and I think from what they are chatting about she may have ‘Sour Crop‘.  So to cut a long story short, after a mad chase around the paddock, I got her back into her nesting box, managed with the assistance of a willing helper (my husband, who is desperately trying to leave for work in his suit!).  After accidently shutting her foot in the door, I held her upside down by her feet hoping that some foul smelling fluid would slip out of her beak (that’s what the chat room said would happen!), but alas, my tactical chunder stunt wasn’t quite as effective as I had been led to believe.  Another site said put some Apple Cider Vinegar into her water, and give her live natural yoghurt and garlic .. shame for both of us that I hadn’t read this handy tip first!

 

Anyway, just checked the British Airways  website and the BA182 is due a little bit earlier than schedule, so poor Mrs Hen will have to wait for her next appointment with the in-house vet!!

 

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Can’t believe it’s Friday already!  I know they say that as you get older, time passes even faster so on that basis I must be totally ancient!  At the beginning of the week I despatched my youngest daughter (15) from her comfort zone in Surrey up to the the big wide world of London.  Initially she was understandably apprehensive, especially because she has been living up there for the week, however judging by what she was tweeting last night, I am considering puttting her room up for rent:

 

“Coming back to Surrey tomorrow! #boring

“Still going as a business woman!! Just had corporate drinks#poshlyhammered

“Found lots of perfect husband material up in the banking district!”

“Can’t help but think my Dorking life is so dull compared to this”

“I think I underestimated London”

 

I am looking forward to her supporting me in my care home in the future, when her career as a city Lawyer has taken off!  I am thinking payback time!  On the subject of dementia, I don’t appear to be the only one in the family showing early signs.  During this week my middle daughter has lost, replaced and then found her student ID, lost, paid for a ticket and then found her free bus pass and then there is this all time classic sign of madness.  After cooking a non-student budget, designer lunch of freshly grilled tuna with rice, she sits down to tuck in, when the Uni fire alarm goes off.  Most people who are sane and value their lives, leave what they are doing immediately and evacuate, but oh no!  Mad people scurry to their bedroom with their plate full of food and hide away and keep tucking in!  Maybe a twin room in Sunrise is an option .. come to think of it, I have a husband who thinks he is a dog, and comments as if he is our dog, Wilfred, on Facebook.  Maybe we need a family suite, and with a Lawyers salary that will be possible!

 

On the subject of madness, I took my mum to the Opticians yesterday, which was an epic mission in itself.  I managed to park on the only patch of ice in the car park, and as she placed her walking stick down as she vacated the car, nearly re-broke her hip.  Then she convinced herself she had never been to this Optician before, and that it had changed locations, and whilst taking her back to the car she had a panic attack, refused to move, and accused me of navigating her to the wrong car park!  On the positive side, and there is always one in my experience from my half full perspective, her eyesight has improved over 12 months.  She had been diagnosed previously with Macular Degeneration; she had been recommended to take Lutein,an important natural antioxidant that may help your eyes stay healthy.  It seems to have worked!

Lutein in a strong dose for M.D.

 

And then there was the return of the snow, and we are back into the artic conditions that arrived 7 days ago …

 

 

I am now looking forward to the arrival of my personal copy of Fifty Shades of Grey, which I shall be devouring over half term!

 

 

 

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As if I don’t feel like I am getting old already! Dull ache in my right knee from skiing, have to reach for reading glasses at all times now if I am wanting to see text clearly, the odd hot flush, the odd grey hair, early signs of dementia pointed out daily by my kids, and bloody Facebook!!!  If you glance at the advertisements to the right of your page they are specifically targeted to your age group.  So whilst my girls are probably viewing banners saying “Dare to Dazzle in Designer Dress”  or “Get your Mini Adventure here” or “Hot date with Marcus Schenkenberg”….  I am bombarded with ads saying “Follow these simple skin care tips and remove 20 years of wrinkles for free” with a photo of Jennifer Aniston endorsing it, and  “Burn 1 stone of belly fat”,  and “Back pain interrupting your running?” followed by “52 year old mom looks 32 … what is her 5$ secret?”.  So thank you Facebook for making me feel good about myself …  is this maybe anti-social networking at its best??  Or maybe I should just amend my date of birth on my profile!?

HOW TO LOOK 20 YEARS YOUNGER!

Marcus Schenkenberg

 

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